Him: You’re being Courtney Love’s Twitter.

Me: I’m totally stealing that.

Coincidentally, Courtney Love just accidentally tweeted a link to a NSFW picture of herself meant for a guy she’s dating. She said today she’s leaving Twitter because of it. Though she’s left twice before and always returned. Bye Courtney. I mean hello Courtney.

Him: You have to let me on. I’m gay. I need to get to Broadway.

“Him” was a late 20s Asian man in a grey suit, red tie and blonde country girl wig. The driver allowed him on for free, though the man ended up getting off at the main stop for a hospital rather than gay neighborhoodish Broadway. Good call on his part. The hospital won’t steal his wig.

Her: Put the banana in your bag. I don’t want it.

Him: Why’d we get it then?

Her: I don’t want the banana. Respect me!